Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
it's like iHOP with fire
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
he just fucked me for my cheese..
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
