he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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