My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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