Sponge bath it is.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
