It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
