You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
