we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
