using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
