You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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