Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
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