She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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