Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
