We're facebook friends in real life
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
