Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
