At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize