it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Randomize
