I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
