Well apparently he's into motor boating.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
