no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Still dying that you shit outside
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
