he puts the penis in happiness.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Randomize
