my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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