All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I haven't been this sober since birth.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
