Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
