he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
