who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
