Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize