Got a toothbrush?
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I deserve this hangover.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
