Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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