Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
