So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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