So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize
