He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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