At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I have aggressive nipples.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Randomize
