sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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