Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize
