I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
her vagine was all disorganized.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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