what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
