she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
