I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Randomize
