I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
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