How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
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