Having a random hookup so left but love u
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
