Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
A bitchslap is in order.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize