benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
