It was confusing and full of hummus
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
