Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
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