He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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