i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
