I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
two words...techno handjob
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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