I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Randomize
